Tuesday, February 12, 2013
2013 has been insane so far - I remember New Year's Eve when I was calmly and quietly welcoming in the new year, naively thinking that this new year would be chill and that we'd have a slow easing in to this whole becoming a parent thing. I couldn't have been more wrong!
January started with a bang when we got a call from our assigned social worker asking if she could come to our house the following Monday (i.e. less than a week from the call). This call put us immediately into getting busy mode, including emptying out our soon to be nursery and completely organizing our basement. We had moved into our new house on November 25, 2011, but we had just started using the spare bedroom (that is - nursery) and our fully finished basement as storage areas. Not neatly organized ones either. But over the course of 4-5 days, we completely (and finally!) unpacked our house and fully settled in (yes, over a year later ... we like to take our time doing things...).
Next came 3 Monday afternoon visits - a total of 15 hours of visits in our home by the social worker. This meant two full tours of our house and intense interviews. Our social worker couldn't have been more perfect - she too is originally from Saskatchewan (Bob's mom's hometown, in fact!) and knew family connections of Bob's. Such a small world. Our social worker is a birthmom, having placed her daughter in 1976, under the closed adoption system. It was interesting to hear her story and get her side of the picture. Although we all got along very well, the process was gruelling and emotionally difficult. Talking about your complete life history, with all of its ups and downs, is no easy feat. I'm glad the hard parts are over.
Following this 3 week adoption boot camp, we had the opportunity to get away to the Mayan Riviera in Mexico for a full week! Aaaaaahhhhhh.... just what we needed. Bob's best friend got married to a lovely bride and there were 80 of us prairie folk who made our way down for the week. Such a fun time ... and just what we needed.
Our homestudy report is nearly finished being drafted by our social worker - I sent in a detailed timeline of my childhood, focused on what the timeline of my parents' divorce was, visits with my dad, time I spent separated from him, if I received any counselling during the process and how/why I reached out to my dad and his family at age 23. It's stirred up a little bit of emotion, but I think the best part about this is it allows me to look at the situation objectively. I've been able to piece bits of the puzzle together and form an adult opinion of what was happening and why. It's allowed me to move one step further along the forgiveness-and letting-go scale.
I seriously can't believe that this is almost done and that we're nearly on the list. This is really, really happening. We are almost, almost expecting a baby. I'm scared man, for reals. Like me, with a baby? (insert peep of a scream here.) We went to visit our neighbours' new set of newborn twins (their second set in 4 years!) and I just marvelled at these little boys and realized that soon I will have my own little guy or gal to feed, care for, hold, change, bath and worry about. Ohmygod, ohmygod, ohmygod.
And holy crap - so many congratulations going out in blog world! CRISTY (one of my all-time fave bloggers is expecting TWINS!!!!!). And Adele has a new house! Shout out to these super lady friends.
With that, today is CD 1 of my period, which means endo hell. I've drugged myself with NSAIDs and am waiting until the doctor's office opens at 9 a.m. to head there and start talking about a long-term plan to manage this disease. More on that to come. :)
Listening to: Kate Earl - One Woman Army (LISTEN AND LOVE - watch the whole thing, cry a little at the end, then watch it and listen to the lyrics all over again).